Hey 2021.  Your time is done!

While better than 2020, you did have your ups and downs.  I mean, starting your reign with a deadly riot on our Capitol did not portend well for things to come.  But you did redeem yourself to some extent with the widespread availability of COVID vaccines and a sufficient production of toilet paper.  You didn’t do so great in the weather department, what with excessive heat, fires, hurricanes, and tornadoes.  But on the plus side, Britany Spears was released from under her daddy’s thumb.

We’re still wearing masks and social distancing, but Big Pharma has not stood still.  As in the past, 2021 has produced another bumper crop of new drugs with names that defy the linguistic rules of practically every language on the face of the earth.  So, for your New Year’s Eve pleasure, I present my annual year-end Stupid Drug Names quiz.  Take it now, or later, after you’ve had a few!

Tezspire

  1. A long, pointy thing atop a tez.
  2. What happens when Tez goes to the gym and does too many reps.
  3. Motivational messages from Tez Talks.
  4. Here we go again!

Livtencity

  1. An urban area named after Mr. and Mrs. Livten
  2. Measure of power of a liv.
  3. A count that comes after livninecity.
  4. A, definitely A.

Voxzogo

  1. Zogo speaks!
  2. An all-girl rock band specializing in Latin hymns.
  3. An urgent request for Voxzo to leave!
  4. A or B, or possibly C.

Brexafemme

  1. A female rock group from Brexa
  2. An old shampoo for women trying to make a comeback
  3. A coalition of women who have decided to flee England.
  4. All of the above.

Saphnelo

  1. A new flavor of ice cream invented by a Greek poet.
  2. Olenhpas spelled backwards.
  3. What you get when you tap a hnelo tree.
  4. None of the above.

Cytalux

  1. A high-end cyta.
  2. A recently discovered single cell organism.
  3. Electrified cytoplasm.
  4. I’m getting a migraine!

Scemblix

  1. What it was called when one of the reindeer tried to deceive Santa.
  2. A Vaseline-like substance to prevent dryness of the scem
  3. A new board game using made-up words
  4. Is this almost over?

Exkivity

  1. The former husband of Kivity
  2. You used to have a hole in your tooth but you had it filled
  3. That which comes before Ykivity
  4. Where’s the Advil?

Truseltiq

  1. The opposite of a fake seltiq
  2. A fancy store that carries hernia supports
  3. Qitlesurt spelled backwards.
  4. B, definitely B

Vyvgart

  1. What Vyv used to hold up her stockings
  2. Paintings by Vyvg
  3. Asking Vgart for a reason
  4. Are we there yet?

And honorable mention goes to Qulipta, Tivdak, Welireg, and Azstarys, all of which are causing my spell-check to have a nervous breakdown.

If you have any interest at all, here are the true purposes of the drugs.  Tezspire: treat asthma; Livtencity:post transplant infections; Voxzogo: growth hormone; Brexafemme: treat candidiasis; Saphnelo:lupus; Cytalux: ovarian cancer; Scemblix: leukemia; Exkivity: lung cancer; Truseltiq: carcinoma; Vyvgart: myasthenia gravis

From my family to yours, I wish you a happy, and most important, healthy New Year.  Once again, I thank you for your continued readership and support.  I couldn’t possibly be having this much fun without you!

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